[Story]MSF-77 Firehawks

[Zoss777]

im gonna try out writing a story. What im gonna do is just write a prologue and you guys tell me if im any good. Thanks.

Prologue:

We all flew in silence toward our destination. Our objective was that the Seaside Skirmish's Lighthouse was to be taken back from the enemy's offensive front. We were running a stealth mission over them and we would paratroop right on top of 'em. Tonight. My Brothers in Arms were out of breath, as it seemed, as we were awaiting the hellish firefight that was about to happen. That's when i noticed the green light shining above indicating that the drop hatch would open and we would jump. It was supposed to flicker 3 times until we made a move to jump out. Flick. My palms are sweating. Flick. My partner says a final prayer. Flick. Everything just seemed to fly by then, until i realized i was 100 meters above the royal camp and activated my parachute. And my last thoughts to myself were, we are the people who fight fire with more fire. We are the Firehawks.

[Loutsik]

It's nice, just needs some grammar fixes.

Also, put [story] in the title.

[DogieDude1234]

I like it. However, agreeing with Loutsik, there are a few grammar errors. are destination = our destination; Light house = Lighthouse; Me and my brothers in arms were out of breath as it seemed. Awaiting the hellish firefight that was about to happen. = My Brothers in Arms and I were out of breath, as it seemed, as we awaited the hellish firefight that was about to happen. There are a couple of others, but they're fairly minor. I'm looking forward to seeing how this continues.

[Zoss777]

thanks for your help guys

[godzillaboy100]

Good story. There is a feel of suspense in the prologue. You don't have to but, it's a suggestion, you might want to paragraph your story.

[Zoss777]

Okay im gonna bump this and i think ill wright some more tuesday or something

[Zoss777]

Bump >